Because I am Me….(I still exists & I have no exit)

RAW

Stay Tune in the possibilities of living in life is a big task. Comfort zones are still a far cry for me. When the things are going in a relaxed path, like the past the fate is showing its teeth massively.

                                                                              DO      

The change in terrain for flowing is a good one. But the coincident is Crows and Wolves are same in each and every arena. I can’t inhale their hot whispering. Resisting is a breathtaking one if it is happening in a golden cage. Productivity, calibre and eminence can’t play their roles perfectly in-front of the restriction of a repugnant play. I am an untethered Kite. My wind is my freedom and my space of creativity. I am a Lion in a wild forest, not an one in a Zoo. Regain of my Kingdom is very near.

Because I am Me.

REALIZE

If it is my professional side, another side is remaining. That is personal. In my past periods I was mistakenly driven to mystical paths to find the eternal love, an enchanting relation and an evergreen life. But those were really mistakes. After that I was totally secluded to a situation of no action. But from one day I started to feel an unique feeling when I looking to a person’s face. That was not like the feel happened in past. That was still an awesome experience and still is in us. That person’s care, words, advises and love made me as a perfect man and a perfect Leo. Suddenly I started craving for staying in that experience and feel for my life long. But the reality shook its head in a form of NO. My brain accepted it but my heart is still craving. I know my wish is not going to happen, but I like to dream that in each and every second of my clock. I know we have to live our own lives as separated. I will not be in that person’s happiness but definitely I will be with that person’s dumps and insecurity like a pillar.

Because I am Me.

If I am an animal, I am a Lion

If I am a bird, I am an Eagle

If I am a tree, I am a Teak

If I am water, I am a River

If I am me, definitely I am me……

Divergent

Some people are divergent.

 

 They can feel music in each and every pulse of Mother Nature.

They can see the eternal life in every creation.

They can touch the soul in every body.

They can feel the secret sigh in every sobs.

They can see dewy eyes in every smile.

 

 They will melt and perish in every eye drops.

Later they will reborn as a gleaming candle.

 

 They are the most shining people

Not due to their alluring skin.

It’s because of the ability of their eyes to see the beauty of the world.

 

 They will move always

They will flow always

In every lives

In every souls.

Like a shade and like a shelter.

 

 They will dream for themselves

But they can only deliver than obtaining

They can only find the happiness in it.

 

 People always shoot sarcasms to them

It will affect them

But they will rejuvenate with a captivating smile.

 

 They are the real outlying artists.

They haven’t any followers

They are flowers.

 

 Failures are their own

One day the word fail will fail and fall in front of them, after the sequels of failures.

There they will win.

They will kiss the eternal victory.

 

 “Yes, they are divergent

This world is their home.”

 

 

The Time

This time is wordless

This is the time of a mouth less

and  This is the time of imposture

 

This is the time to sow the seeds

This is the time of dry fields

This is the time of sorry

and This is the time of endurance

 

Pretending of many, is the time

Pretending to many, is the time

Now I can just say it’s a long time

The time of altercation

 

This is the time of reasonless reasons

The time of no stories

Views are only time

Perceptions are only time

But this time is really unseen

 

I have a time

A time, of a time.

 

Prologue (Inhaling the important time)

Nothing is wrong; I will lose myself in your lips.

Nothing is wrong; I will fall monastically in the drowsiness in your hands.

Let’s sing a song together, when we are in the midst of nature.

Let’s dance together, when we are in foggy dumps.

Let’s love forever, when we are in far.

Let’s live together, when we are in far.

Will you make me to sit in the heaps of your cymbals?

Desire

I want to sit on the branch of that sky kissing tree without mention my name.

I want to be a branch of the tree as a heart broken speechless.

I am not your perfect ten, if you have the ten I am the zero in that.

Ten is not ten without the zero; I am always your zero.

I will not in your happiness, I am the happiness in you

I will with you in your dumps, I can’t see my bird as dewy-eyed.

 

My bird, spread your wings upon your dreams.

My bird, fly to your perfect better half.

If my wish is the same, a home will always as open for your foot touch.

 

Reciprocation is not a repetition.

 

We know we are various due to the various.

But we made the bridge for our whole life.

The bridge was built and there were many different buildings

That’s it

We will meet on that bridge as various, but the dream of togetherness will always with us.

 

It is also my desire to be honest

 

 

The Eternal Love

Alice, we’ll have to flee from us.

Yes Edmond, for our families. For a society who never accept the change in changes. We will be separated. Someone will come for you as your better half and someone will come for me.

I knew, my entire body and my soul was possessed by you .But you are not evil, you are my goddess. You dug into my flesh through my hair and placed within my bone marrow. I know it. When my body is burned, the smog out of it will draw your name in the air, Alice, Alice, Alice. If the west wind kisses my ashes then it will smile and murmur your name, Alice, Alice, Alice. If it dissolves in the sea then each wave will say your name, Alice, Alice, Alice…

Edmond, we met not for dying. We met by a power for knowing ourselves without our knowledge. The word Separation is not a massive task for us. We can live together as separated on this earth. We can stay close when we are in far. I am always your Alice.

Yes, we are not a bad dream of the great fate, we are not the couples in a literature, we don’t need a relation’s name to live, we are separated but we are still together. The time is not lost, the time is said, Alice… I love you.

 

 

 

 

“The term LOVE is an end of the eternal love. If we can see all our love in an one love that is the eternal love. The one love Man/Woman”

Seasons

Seasons

Seasons are showing the extreme change. I have to merge as one of them.  My soul rejecting the misty passing clouds.  Because, of the regaining of autumn. Now I can feel the heavy support of the Mother Nature and the ultimate energy. So I can’t plan anything for my life. The whole world has planning for my good and luck. Now I don’t need the presence of passing clouds. Because, I am the Storm in a wild forest.  In front of the storm the passing clouds are nothing. In recent years, experiences taught me about my strength and ability. That was a great realization.

Booster

Insults are really a booster in my life. Insults made me as heavy polished. I was an introvert at once for showing my creativity and knowledge. People in a particular arena never accepted what I was. They always thought I am wrong, less educated, less mannered, less polished and not a wit. They always thought about they are the ultimate, highly experienced, a top wit, and always right. If I rectify an error on their side they can’t inhale that. Because they are thinking I haven’t such knowledge for rectify their statements and if I said something that will be a nonsense. But thought can’t demolish the truth. The truth is the fate. Fate will prove in seasons.

 The Realization

I was a wandering spirit at once for catching some fetching smiles and attentions of some people. They really used the chance to rule me and they never lose the chance to hurt me. But I loved them at very best level because of my soul was too much transparent. I trusted their smiles. Later the seasons proved that they are not a level for my personality. In front of me they are all dishonest and emotionally selfish in some manner and situations. I considered them as like as a beat of my heart and the thing was I travelled with that beat, but I forgot my heart, my soul and my personality. I wandered for smiles of mob in my inner palm, but I missed to notice a crowd around me. A huge crowd of my people. The people in my inner palm were like as sand in a tightened palm. If we tightened, the sand will lose. Yes, it’s lost, it’s for losing, and it has to be lost. That is the fate. Now I have a garden. A garden of blossom and not a garden of prickles. I am happy with it.

“I haven’t a vision but I am a vision.

Respect it, don’t love it.

Knowledge is not someone’s property; it’s for all including us.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can & Can’t (Truth, Demand & Need)

I can’t see the patient sun

I can’t see the patient moon

I can’t see the patient light

I can’t see the patient darkness

Haunted by fake hearts

Rejuvenated by a pure soul

Hunted by dribbling attentions

Revitalized by a strong support

I don’t need a bridge with an emotionally egocentric one

I don’t need a bridge with a physically egocentric one

I pity on a half baked wit

I pity on a feather-headed wit

Only need some delightful hearts

and endearing relations.

I have the patient sun

I have the patient moon

I have the patient light

I have the patient darkness

I am near to the eternal happiness…….

 

The boozed man is on stage……

​Oh the alluring mother nature…

Make my breath as a lazy one.

Oh the west wind…..
Spend some time with me.

Spread my body with your tactful confabulation.

Oh the leaving sun…..

Say an adieu for your remembrance.

Oh my legs……

Move forward as heedless.

Oh My eyes……..

Don’t open for any forecast. 

Oh my ears……

Don’t keep accuracy.

Oh my tongue……

Don’t dribble for words.

Oh my teeth…..

Don’t show your whitened face.

It doesn’t a matter for this world.

Oh my brain……

Only work for relevant.

Don’t do excessive things.

Oh the wandering spirit….

Stay as outlying from the dynasty of self-catering wit.

Oh my wine bottle……

Don’t show your empty stomach.

Pamper me with your each and every drops.

I am just a wandering spirit.

A well evening near a Well (A short story)

​My name is Chris, an executive in a company. I was a minor in the knowledge of my abilities and the depth of my visions . So in people’s attitude I can feel I am an outlying artist. Yah I always like to swim against the flow. I was really crazy in building my own way to find my destination. Yes I don’t know my destination, because I can’t copy someone’s successful life. My satisfaction is secluded in my efforts and my individuality. So I haven’t any role model. All great people lived their life and in my hand I have only my life. I have to furnish my life with my vision, my design, my manners and mannerism in my way.

I think this is the capsule of my picture. In this freelance mood, that was a Sunday. Usually I opened the doors of my garage and my 30 years old friend (car) was ready for a trip. Driving alone on a lonely road has giving a feel of a book reading. After 1 hour I covered almost 30 kilometres and I reached in the boundary of my ancestral house. My childhood was at that house. House situated behind of a huge field. The breeze at there is still a rejuvenating one. At present that house is locked and every month end I am coming to spent some hours at there. 
The front area was full of dust. I unlocked the doors and windows for better air. I diverted in to cleaning mode and started to enjoy the sound of vacuum cleaner. Yah an another 1 hour has passed and I have to relax. After drinking some water I just checked out that house and made a relaxed walking in the field near to the house. At that time I saw a Well on a good distance. That Well was unable to use since some years. I got a near distance from that Well. I looked inside the Well and roared, hellooooooo…..! 
No one has replied..ha ha ha…time of madness. I spent some minutes near the Well and prepared my foot steps for leave. 

Crying…no its a murmur..no no its a song..where is the source of this song?. I looked around, but I can’t see anyone. I realised , it’s from the Well. I again said a big hellooooooo. Now I can hear a tiny sound of a reply. Yah it’s a hello. But who is in this Well.

I put a small stone in that Well. After 3 seconds I heard a sound..oops…I again looked in the Well and I saw a little frog has looking upwards.

A conversation:

Chris: hai..who are you? Wau you can speak like human. Your sound is awesome. Who are you.
Frog: I can’t speak I can sing

          I can sing I can’t speak

          I am a fuzzy frog

          

The frog song….!

Crome..!!..Crome..!! I am a frog..

I can see my own world now

My sky has several colors 

My world has lot of water

My world is a cylinder one

I can sing pretty much

I can speak as authorised 

I can argue and I can command

I have knowledge as I can

I don’t need any more knowledge 

I can speak from my knowledge

I can do from my knowledge 

My knowledge is someone’s words

I can’t explore anymore 

I need only someone’s path

I can’t build my own path

Others should be follow me

Others should be obey me

Others should be smile to me

Hurt is my hurting enemy 

Crome..!!..Crome..!! I am a frog..

I can see my own world now

This well is my only world
Chris’s debate:

Hai frog…nice song. Your explanations about your world is pretty good. But this is not the real world. It’s a part of the world. Your world is a creation of human. It’s a well not a world.

You can argue and command in your knowledge. But the term knowledge is not a limited one. Your knowledge has limited in this Well. Don’t pressurise anybody for injecting your ideas. Respect other’s intentions, emotions and experience. Because they had seen the real world. You are following some one’s path. If you follow that path how can you explore yourself. You have a mission in this world. Don’t waste your life in this Well. Come out, look out the real world, feel it and experience it. You will know the world is not like exactly in books which you had read. Your are specialised in one subject. Yah you are a subject expert. I accepted but a single piece of subject is not the whole world.

You are respecting your knowledge. That’s good. You can move forward based on your knowledge. If you don’t enlarge your knowledge how can you move more forward. You have to stick on one arena and you will always unhappy in your limitations. But you can’t show that because you always pretending about you have great knowledge. Others knows  you are nothing. If they say to you about your foolishness you are considering them as fools and it hurts your brain. So you are saying ” hurt is your hurting enemy”. They are not hurting you. They are teaching you about the world is not which you had seen. But you can’t accept. You can only exhale can’t inhale. 

This is not a world. This is a sphere. You have to come out. Come on let’s feel the world. Now you are in water in a Well. You have to see the mother nature. Build your own path. If it is hard you will get the eternal happiness. Come out frog come out. Speak something.

Frog: I can’t speak I can sing

          I can sing I can’t speak

          I am a fuzzy frog

Chris: OK. ..then sing 

Frog: Crome..!!..Crome..!! I am a frog..

I can see my own world now

This well is my only world
Chris: ha ha ha…you are still a frog in a Well.
Chris….Chris…what are you doing.  Hey man get up. Boss has calling…

 

What? Boss?  Boss at here…oh my God. .I am at office…then frog, house. ….that was a day dream…!!! I slept in office hours…oh my God. .where is that file???
OK. .OK. .cool down Chris cool down. I have to do my job. If I am fired from this job I will get an another one. I am human not the Frog in the Well. I am not a half baked wit.